A Charmed Life: Life's a Play!

Have you ever been to court? For a lawsuit involving yourself?


I never-ever imagined to be in court for any issue involving myself. In fact, my MA thesis is about "Alternative Dispute Resolution" which espouses what the words literally mean -- an 'alternative way of resolving disputes -- meaning, not using the legal system in redressing disputes, if at all possible. The concept of ADR is being practiced in many countries now. An advantage of the ADR method is to avoid the long, costly, dragging, and exhausting court procedures. Also, resolving disputes through other means other than the legal system is a great help in reducing the clogging of cases in government courts.


I strongly support the ADR method, and, I also never thought of myself being involved in whatever disputes that are deserving of 'court-attention' anyway. These are the 2 main reasons why I never imagined or expected to be in court.


But sometimes, the inevitable can happen, and you are not left with a better choice. You've got to do what you've got to do to remedy some imbalance.


Early this year, after 2 and a half years of a fully ripened loan, I filed a lawsuit against my previous boss. Perhaps because of either my generosity or naivety I became a victim of a liar. I learned that even her very reason in coaxing me to lend her money was based on a lie. "Please lend money to help our needy blah blah. You will be immediately paid after a month, blah blah..." And I believed her. I trusted her so much (after all she is my employer, the one who is giving me my salary) that I didn't even press for a written agreement. I didn't even think of collecting interest for the loaned money, after all, I was promised that my money will be borrowed for the short duration of a month only. I've been working for my boss for more than a year already, how can I not trust her?


Not firmly asking for a written agreement or a receipt was a big mistake. Trusting her was a big mistake. Being easy on her for the initial months -- not strongly pressing for the payback was a big mistake. Not asserting myself was a big mistake. I admit I made mistakes.


Thus the issue became bigger and nastier. I talked her into ADR, to discuss and settle the matter between us only, but she wouldn't budge. Instead, she simply continued giving me the same lies and excuses she have already told me many times before. After I filed the case in court, and as it is a part of the legal system's preliminary procedure, one of the legal mediators again tried the possibility of amicable settlement. But, just the same, the defendant wouldn't want to admit that she received any money from me. She insisted that she didn't receive the said loan and she never used my money. I'm at the losing end because I don't have any tangible evidence to prove that I loaned her money. Since we cannot come up with an agreement because the defendant stubbornly refuses to acknowledge responsibility, our case was passed-on to another branch of the court, this time it is for the judge to arbitrate.


I went on with the case for I strongly felt the urge to do something about the problem. To correct a past mistake, for the restoration of self-respect due to the lies and 'abuses' that transpired. And, certainly, I also need the money which I thought was properly "mine."


It's not a huge amount of money, but, just like any other lawsuit, I confirmed what I only knew in theory -- that legal court cases are truly time and energy consuming as well as more costly than necessary. We were asked to go to court several times only to be unheard, and case re-scheduled yet again and again. In addition, I had to go to court to follow-up on the developments as the sheriff is a little too slow in delivering the 'notices.'


to be continued ...